Nothing audible came out. In fact, I am pretty certain that no sound came out at all. Not even a squeak.

Did I at least smile? No. No I did not.

I just stood there, awkwardly, with my mouth open cultivating a pregnant silence that hung from the air. My mind just would not stop considering the unlimited number of ways I could manage to embarrass myself, and how avoid them. It was too late. Of all the things that could go wrong, I had not imagined that saying hello would be such a difficult thing to get right. I was unprepared.

Chad, a sweet but tragically awkward guy in our office walked about 3 steps behind him.

“Morning Summer,” he said cheerfully, his eyes moving quickly to the floor.

Of course I could get a reply out fine for him. I realised later that I probably sounded obviously disappointed in speaking to him. I worried about my rudeness briefly, then I went back to lamenting my lack of coolness. He was so unattainable. So far out of my reach that I could barely see what I was aiming for.

The more I told myself that what I was feeling was wrong, the stronger my emotions became. What difference did a gold ring make to my heart? The heart wants what it wants, and mine wanted him, with every inch of my existence. I had to have him this time.